Author Archives: Nicola Cameron
Dumb Ways to Die
Recently I’ve been working on my speed and stamina while walking on the treadmill, and today I knocked out a full mile in a half hour. And yes, I know this is bubkes for a lot of people who regularly do marathons, but I’m a big broad with one artificial knee and one that will need to be replaced at some point so for me it’s an achievement.
Part of my impetus is friends of mine who just did a 10K at the RunDisney Springtime Surprise event. They really got me thinking about doing something similar, and right now my goal is to be able to do a 5K within an hour. A 5K, BTW, is 3.1 miles, which means if I walk/jog at a 3.1 MPH pace for an hour I will have finished the race in the allotted time.
But apparently most athletic people can do a 5K in 45 minutes, which translates to a 4.13 MPH walking/running pace. And because I’m an idiot and now know what a 2 MPH pace feels like, I got on the treadmill a few minutes ago and bumped up the speed to 4.1 just to see what it’s like.
I promptly tripped, hit my nose on the display board, and strained my arm muscles as I clung to the railings while dragging my feet over to the side rails before the damn treadmill fired me into the wall behind it. I’m sure it would have looked hilarious to anyone watching me. Unsurprisingly I have a nosebleed (although it’s pretty much stopped now) and I think I may have a mild case of whiplash, not to mention the strain in my upper arms.
So, yeah, that would have been a dumb way to die. I may be able to get up to that speed at some point but it is most definitely not going to happen any time soon.
Crystal Blade Ep 8 Is Up
It’s over here if you want to read it. And I’ve discovered something—not exactly dismaying, but it explains a few things.
I have had people reading through the paid chapters, bless all of you who did that, and I had expected to make a tiny bit of money for those reads. But my Vella dashboard keeps reporting $0 royalties on episode reads.
So I did some digging. It turns out that Amazon offers you 200 free tokens in order to get you reading Vella chapters, which is great. I took them up on that myself, and I bet a lot of people have done the same thing. Except that those free tokens don’t count towards royalties so you have to burn through them and then actually buy some tokens before the author starts seeing any royalties on their dashboard.
Which is … yeah, annoying. I wish they’d explained that right off the bat because I’ve been reading friends’ Vella stories and it turns out that they’re not getting any moola for my reads. It also means that I’m going to burn through these as fast as possible so that I can buy some more and, you know, actually pay for my reads.
Technology. *shakes head*
Time To Give Back
I love having other writers as friends. I’ve spent the weekend beta reading my friend William Ledbetter’s latest novel Level Seven, the third entry in his Killday series, and it is freaking awesome. BTW, the second novel in the series, Level Six, is currently available for pre-order! Here’s the blurb:
Fifteen years after warring artificial intelligences nearly destroyed Earth, Abby, the daughter of Killday hero Leah Gibson, finds an artifact from that struggle, upsetting a delicate balance of power and dragging her into the middle of a new fight for humanity’s survival.
One AI faction is working with humanity to repair a biosphere teetering on the edge of collapse, while another faction cares only about elevating itself to a higher plane of intelligence and will destroy anyone who gets in the way. As the only humans still not controlled by AIs race to build huge orbital habitats in space, a more secretive organization grows in the shadows and idolizes the man who triggered the nano-replicator attacks that nearly destroyed the world. They, too, believe the only way to stop the AIs is to annihilate everything.
In Nebula Award winner William Ledbetter’s Level Six, one woman has the power to save humanity — if she can survive long enough to use it.
If you like post-apocalyptic SF with smart characters, battling AIs, and cool space exploration, you’ll want to check out this series.
Crystal Blade Ep 7 Is Up
Forgot to mention that yesterday, sorry. It’s here if you want a direct link and I have one dedicated reader (hi, Peter) but I would really, really like to get some more.
In other matters, J.J. has been gone for a month. Well, that isn’t strictly true—March 22 was a Wednesday, which meant that the four week anniversary was on April 19. But none of that really matters.
I still miss him. I always will, and if that sounds weird to some people I don’t really care. I also know that it was time. He was old, tired, and hurting, and his passing was a blessing for him. I am completely sure that he’s fine, wherever he is, and he’s not in pain anymore. That’s a good thing.
And it’s been a lot easier to clean the house this last month and get stuff done without constantly having to keep an ear out for him or do the assorted chores necessary to keep him clean, dry, and comfortable. The living room doesn’t have the faint smell of pee anymore and I’m not constantly buying pee pads or running 4-5 loads of laundry every day to wash his bedding. And I do appreciate that.
But I miss the healthy young cat who would follow me from room to room, who would curl up at the foot of the mattress while I slept, who would stay by my side when someone came to the door, ready to leap on the interloper if they tried to hurt me. He wasn’t a lap cat and didn’t like being picked up or held until his later years, but he would sit on the back or arm of my chair and just hang out with me while I wrote or watched TV.
He was my heart cat and I want him back, and I know that won’t ever happen. So I just have to keep on keeping on, and take good care of the rest of the J Crew, and maybe someday I’ll see him again when it’s time for me to move on. I would like that.
So Much On My Plate
Lord, I’m juggling so much at the moment. Between being an indie author with all the hats I have to wear in that business, trying to crank out stories under my SF name, making jewelry (don’t judge—my sterling silver jewelry brings in decent money and crafting is part of my writing process), and managing everything in the house, it can be a challenge at times.
But I could also be stuck in an office job that I loathed and dealing with a micromanaging boss. So I’m looking on the bright side here and reminding myself to schedule a little free time in between everything else.
Speaking of the jewelry, I’ve already sold one of the pieces I made this week and now have a placeholder page here where I’ll be putting new pieces as I get them (yes, I had an Etsy store but I’m tired of dealing with their rising costs. I’d rather just pay a flat PayPal fee and keep the rest of my money). If I’m correct I can add a Buy Now button to each piece that will take people to PayPal where they can purchase the piece with their PP account or a credit card.
I think. I know a website I used to manage was able to do that, so I should be able to as well. Need to experiment over the weekend, tra la…
My Knee Is One Year Old
One year ago today I was in a hospital bed recovering from total knee replacement surgery on ShitKnee. During that time I learned that I will vomit copiously if given IV opiates and Zofran is the only thing that will stop it (good to know for future surgeries), the inside of my joint looked like a bomb had gone off in there, and that the nurses, CNAs, and PTs at Medical City Frisco were incredibly professional and kind. Also, my surgeon had one hell of a good stitching technique.
Today the knee is considered to be 100% healed and I pretty much have full mobility. There is some scarring on the outer side of the knee that has nothing to do with the surgery and everything to do with 38-year-old adhesions. one of which I broke last May. That area is still a little tender but it’s getting better and better as I keep moving and wearing down the little buggers.
In the picture above, taken about this time a year ago, I have my nice grippy socks, an elastic wrap and the cooling pad of my ice machine below my brace (the black thing with the blue stitching), and a pump on both calves that squeezed them intermittently to keep blood flowing and prevent blood clots. The blue foam pillow is an instrument of torture designed to promote my knee straightening to 0°. Going to the bathroom required a nurse to unhook me from my IV, ice machine, and calf pumps, and I used a walker to get in and out of the bathroom. But I was able to do it on my own, and I astounded the physical therapist when I walked to the end of the hallway and back to my room the next day.
One thing I learned and will pass onto anyone looking at joint surgery—do prehab. These are exercises that will get your joint into the best condition possible for the surgery and they will cut down on your recovery time. I am living proof of that. And keep doing your post-surgery PT exercises. They suck, but they keep your joint mobile.
Today is also another interesting milestone in my life in that I am now officially in menopause. My last period started on 4/18/22 and ended on 4/20/22 which means I have gone a calendar year without a period and am now a Crone. Personally, I’m relieved. Perimenopause was no joke (imagine going through a second puberty, only with this one you get hot flashes, night sweats, and gum problems along with the pimples and body changes) and I’m glad to be done with all that. I just threw out some really ratty t-shirts which means there’s room in my drawers for a new one—I need to find a really good Crone t-shirt.
Episode Six of Crystal Blade is Live
I hope this doesn’t bug anyone but I’ll be mentioning each new episode (I have got to stop calling them chapters) as I post them so that interested readers can simply click and go straight to the episode page.
Episode 6: https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/episode/B0C32WTWBJ
In other news my new knee is officially one year old today, whee. I can walk a mile in a half hour (working on improving that—I would like to do a 5K this year) and apart from some garbage left from the adhesions I have full mobility and no pain. The other knee is holding steady, although now that I’m able to move around more easily it is starting to get a little achy more often. Once it gets regularly painful I can go back in to TMI and get gel shots—my surgeon said that ideally he’d like to get me into my sixties before we replace that knee (and we will have to replace it—it’s a matter of if, not when). Works for me.
Oh, and I’m also officially in menopause, whee! Got to find a really good Crone t-shirt…
Okay, TODAY Is Officially Tax Day
And man, am I happy I got all of that done in February. Of course I have to send in the estimated taxes for Q1 and pay all the bills but that’s not a problem, I’m set up for that.
I’m also back at the jewelry bench, tra la. In addition to two other pendants I’m working on a rutilated quartz pendant that I’m going to use in a giveaway next week. Those of you who read A Theory of Crystal will remember that Yelena and her men were able to use rutilated crystal to save themselves from an unfriendly blast of magical evergy, and the cabochons are super pretty so I wanted to make one into a pendant. I’ll post pics once that’s done, and I’m giving some serious thought to creating a unique piece for each book from here on and using those as giveaways for promo.
Although I’m not giving away the carved labradorite flower bracelet from Shadow of the Swan that I’m going to make. That one is for me. Although I could be talked into making another one if there’s any interest…
Crystal Blade Is Officially Live
And it’s official. The first five episodes of Crystal Blade are now available on Kindle Vella, may the Flying Spaghetti Monster have mercy on my soul, and the first three eps are free. I’ll be posting three episodes a week on a M-W-F basis until the story is done, and thirty days after that I’ll take everything down and publish it as an ebook and print book.
So if you want to check out the continuing adventures of Crystal and the Buff Lords right the heck now, head on over!
- Crystal Blade Home Page: https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B0C2PHK17L
- Episode One: https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/episode/B0C2P9ZZTF
- Episode Two: https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/episode/B0C2P8SJWW
- Episode Three: https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/episode/B0C2PD2YCJ
- Episode Four (paid): https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/episode/B0C2PF1TT2
- Episode Five (paid): https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/episode/B0C2PB471S
And Now We Wait
Five chapters of Crystal Blade have been uploaded to Vella (Chapter Six needs more editing than I’m capable of doing right now) and are currently chugging through the ‘Zon. I’ll get Chapter Six whipped into shape tomorrow and uploaded, then I’ll start my two chapters a week upload schedule (and may I just say that my fanfic experience is coming very much in handy right now).
Also, the image at right is the story’s avatar. I think it says “fantasy romance” well enough and goes along with the title (and the five-pointed star was an unintended bonus that refers to the Buff Lords). I’m really hoping this does well because my ‘Zon income is a joke at the moment. The custom text AMS ads are still not serving (I’ve created automatic ads for all my titles so at least some ads are getting served) and my sales are wretched.
All of which is just convincing me to put all of my titles wide sooner than later. KU is clearly compromised and I’m not making anything near what I was making from it last year, and with Kobo starting KoboPlus (their version of KU that doesn’t require a title to be exclusive to Kobo) I would have a bit more stability and might even make more money if I went wide. Plus I wouldn’t have to worry about the ‘Zon abruptly yanking my author account because someone else had posted one of my books on a pirate site.
But for now I’m happy and pumped about Blade. With a good tail wind I should get it finished by the end of the month, then I can get started on Crystal Reflection, High Tide, and To Love a Wild Swan.
Nicola Cameron Writes 